Jehle Coaching Blog - What I’m thinking and doing (what’s new)…

Are you an Optimist? Great! If not, here's some help:

I am reading a book called, “Useful Delusions”, which talks about how our mind plays tricks on ourselves to help us be more resilient. One of the research-based sections is on optimism and how optimists live longer. Sorry for those of you who don’t use your rose colored glasses very much. Dust them off and try to remember the positives in life and be grateful for them. Here some ideas: Be grateful, stand like Wonder Woman and smile more often.

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How we are easily persuaded and manipulated (research-based)

When I teach negotiation, I pull out the Six Principles of Persuasion by Dr. Robert Cialdini (a professor and sociologist) and we discuss two things: the students’ own experience with being persuaded (or not) and how they might use these principles in negotiations and at work, in general.

Here are the big six:

· Reciprocity

· Scarcity

· Authority

· Consistency

· Consensus

· Liking (people)

Let me explain each one and how they may be used “against” you to be persuaded and even (gasp) manipulated.

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What was I scared of and other success stories

We all have fears, and fear is normal. We are made to have fear so we run away from imminent danger.

But sometimes our fear goes “sideways” and comes out in the “wrong place.

Sometimes we are afraid of the wrong things.

Sometimes fear overwhelms and gets us in a stuck place.

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Thoughts on Decision Making

Are you trying to make a decision about something and just can’t get past some of the “ish” factors? Or are you talking yourself into something that maybe you (or your trusted network) might not feel so right about- maybe you are wanting to just get that first deal? ALSO: Loss aversion can derail our plans, our business, our life. It makes us focus too much on the short-term and not the long-term. We tend to give up on things that we see as loss to us especially when we apply great meaning to that thing, whatever it might be. We need to remember to always think long-term.

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Feedback is Hard AND very GOOD for us

When we are dealing with feedback you can either take it seriously and try to change or you can blame “the circumstances beyond your control” and avoid doing anything.

Sometimes, granted, the circumstances are beyond our control: covid, lockdowns, shifts in market demand are all beyond our control. But how we respond to them is pretty much under our control.

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Are you learning and change -ready? We all can learn and change!

We all are learning beings.

Life is all about learning.As a child we learn to speak and walk and soon enough we are running and chatting away… The main idea is to be open to feedback and even criticism, looking for even wee grains of truth. We all have something to learn. Let us keep on learning, even if we think “I know this”.

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What does it take to be a great coach?

What characteristics are needed to be a good coach? Authority, Authenticity, Integrity and Empathy.

Authority: Are you “able to do the job well”?

Authenticity, Integrity, Empathy: This begins with personal-awareness skills: self-awareness, self-management, and knowing that your own reactions are part of the method of coaching (and supervision). You as the coach are the most powerful “tool” and intervention.

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