How we are easily persuaded and manipulated (research-based)

Are you easily persuaded? 

Or not?

Maybe we all are more easily persuaded than we realize.

When I teach negotiation, I pull out the Six Principles of Persuasion by Dr. Robert Cialdini (a professor and sociologist) and we discuss two things: the students’ own experience with being persuaded (or not) and how they might use these principles in negotiations and at work, in general.

Here are the big six:

·      Reciprocity

·      Scarcity

·      Authority

·      Consistency

·      Consensus

·      Liking (people)

Let me explain each one and how they may be used “against” you to be persuaded and even (gasp) manipulated.

Reciprocity is the idea that if someone does something for us or gives us something, we feel obliged to return the favor/kindness.  In some cultures, reciprocity is a MUST value, btw.  If you receive a packet of post-its in the mail from a NGO asking for money, this is reciprocity. If your colleague offers to work while you go on vacation and then asks you to do likewise, this is also reciprocity- notice one may be more acceptable than the other.  If you receive an unexpected gift from (just) an acquaintance, you may expect him or her to ask you for support or a favor and relatively soon.  We are made to reciprocate in kind - and this trait is what it is.

Scarcity is when the store says: “only for a limited time” or “only while supply lasts”.  Scarcity can also be used when an employee says they are thinking of moving on when they are really hoping for a raise.  The fact that numbered luxury items are even more expensive than regular ones is due to scarcity.  We want to have “one of a few” and this can be used against you.

Authority is the easy one: when someone uses status, education degree, wealth, knowledge, and power to assert their opinion and get you to believe them, they are using authority. Be wise yourself: not all wisdom comes from the above list. Many of the wisest people I know have not much education, wealth, and power (maybe they have knowledge, because libraries are still free) of the above.

Consistent (-cy) is what we want to be and even more, be seen as.  Thus, someone who asks you to do a little favor may come back later and ask for a bigger one - and you may feel obliged because you don’t want to be seen as inconsistent.  Also, a company may ask you to raise the level of your subscription because you are more likely to do that than to stop the subscription all together. This may even work for cars and other big items, just so you know.

Consensus is what my mother tried to help me fight against as a child.  Maybe you heard this, too, “If everyone wants to play on the highway, are you going to do it, too?”  It’s that old adage, “if everyone is doing it, it must be… good, right, or best”.  But is it? Companies like Apple, amazon and more recently, Tesla use this trait to their advantage. Maybe some of your friends use this, as well?  “Come on, nobody has a problem with this… Everybody…”

Liking (people) is just that: we are more likely to choose to follow, hire, buy from, listen to a charming person. Narcissists use this to their advantage, companies, too.  Also, we will buy from a friend over a “stranger”, even if the prices are much higher.

Many companies, and unfortunately, some people, use these researched principles to their advantage to persuade and even manipulate.  But now you know about them and can reflect on them when someone asks you to buy from, to support, or to do something for them.

Have a great success with clear thinking in your decision-making and in your buying (or not-buying).

Patricia Jehle               patricia@jehle-coaching.com