STOP and be grateful for success

End of November 2021

It’s a season where we think we should be grateful but what can we be grateful for?

There’s bad news all around starting with a continuing pandemic (now we have delta and omicron) and ending with wars and rumors of wars, famine, diseases (other than covid) and floods.  

Locally, there has been bad news, too:  a friend has yet more tumors, another has suffered a heart attack and is still very weak, a few friends have lost their jobs, one who works in the helping service “industry” says, “It’s November so you can expect the worst.”- and that’s also without covid.

Last weekend was the USA’s biggest weekend celebration: Thanksgiving.  ‘Tis the season to be thankful, to be grateful.  

DO you realize it would be good for your health and well-being to really take time and count your blessings?- even if you have to have a zoom Thanksgiving/Hannukah/Christmas.

Even though your (and my) life is sometimes hard, it is important to make that small shift from pity party to thankful thinking.  Sometimes this is hard, so I have purposefully thought of things that I am grateful for right now:

·      It’s snowing huge flakes – just picturesque!!!

·      Even though it’s cold, I am warm, dry, fed and inside a heated and well-insulated building.  

·      I am safe and when I go to work and shopping I have a very good mask and am immunized three times.

·      I have more than enough employment and clients and this that pays the bills. (And I love my jobs!).

·      My husband is doing well in his massage practice startup.

·      I am healthy enough.

·      I have friends and family who love and care for me- and I can depend on them. 

·      Finally, I have sweet pets who show me love and attention, too.

Count your blessings and be grateful.

After this little exercise, I feel better, even with all the bad news in the world.  

I have taken my negative thought process and moved it to a positive one and I am able now to look at the bad news from a place of gratefulness and calm, and even better, I can help others to move from that place pf negativity to gratefulness.  

It’s a double blessing:  I am blessed and then I can help others, so I can be a blessing, to them (rather than a whiner bringing others down even more).

So, when something negative happens (or you read about something in the news): 

STOP and

1)    THINK – What’s happening inside and outside of me?  

What’s important about it?  

What are my thoughts about this? What is my body telling me, too?

2)    FEEL – What emotions am I feeling?  Is it anger, fear, sadness?  Frustration? 

Weariness in the soul? Something else? Stay there a moment.  My emotions tell me something: what is it they are telling me?

3)    REFLECT – What am I believing about the issue?  

Is it (really) true, or is it a lie I am telling myself, or just something unproven?  Or, as Brené Brown puts it so well, is it “a story I tell in my head”?

Also ASK:

What can I do to change the issue – or can I change myself?

Is my reaction appropriate for the situation (sometimes the emotion is weaker, stronger, or maybe just not the REAL one… and often, in cases of justice, for example, anger is very appropriate, just as sadness is appropriate for loss)- I will let myself feel the feelings I am having!

FINALLY: What can my next step or two be, right now? (maybe going through the process of feeling and thinking is enough for now, maybe adding a gratefulness exercise is also appropriate)

When can (or do I want to) make that next step or two?

Always BE grateful:

Finally, CONSIDER, what can I be grateful for right here and now?  

How can I show myself that I am grateful?  

How will others know that I am grateful, even in the midst of bad news?

In the near future, the next day/ week/ month you and I can look back on this process and evaluate:  

What went well, what might need improving and how can I do it?

If nothing else remember, STOP, THINK, FEEL, REFLECT – and BE GRATEFUL.

Have a great time being thankful for the big and small blessings, even in the midst of late fall 2021.

Patricia Jehle               patricia@jehle-coaching.com